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What is your life long hobby?

So I just got out of a 5 year relationship. Gf dumped me.

And now I’ve realized I became entirely dependent on her. I don’t have my own life. No friends. Didn’t make my own decisions. If she wanted to watch a tv show that’s what we did. If she wanted to play a game that’s what we did. She called the shots and I tagged along with her. Not in a controlling way. I liked everything she picked. Which led me
To never pursue my own interests because she always had something fun planned.

Well now I feel like a lost dog. Idk what to do. I don’t feel like watching tv or playing games. I need a good hobby to get into to occupy my own time so I don’t lose my mind

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  1. Exercise is always a good option! It helps with stress and anxiety, and can make you feel better about the way you look, even if you’re OK with the way you look to begin with.

    Outside of that, what are you into? It sounds like you need to find “you”, as your ex dictated what you did as couple, so what are some of your interests?

  2. Honestly my lifelong hobby is finding new hobbies. But just recently picked up gardening and its strangely fun tending to it and watching it grow. May be a bit late to plant any crops right now for you though.

    I also enjoy painting, board games, collecting knives, and finding things to fix around the house. Like you I also enjoy video games and movies. Of course working out is great too but ive been a bum since quarantine started. I say try some stuff out and see if it worked for ya.

  3. Powerlifting, wrenching on cars and reading. Each is a sanctuary in its own way. I own my strength, mechanical skills and knowledge. Can’t take those away from me even at my darkest times.

  4. If money isn’t an issue, get an old car to restore. Trust me, you’ll never have free time again because SOMETHING will always be BROKEN so you have to FUCKIN FIX IT

    Seriously though cars are a great hobby, it feels great when you finally get everything running and it’s a thing you can actually use in your everyday life. Drawbacks are they’re expensive and they take up the whole garage.

  5. Weightlifting is my go to. Always available, I love the feeling, and it’s good for you. There’s so much to learn regarding programming and nutrition. And you can join competitions if you really like winning shit. Plus being big and strong is a huge bonus.

    Recently been hiking way more too, also great to see sights and get some good sun and O2. It’s nice to conquer mountains. You can really get some inner peace on a nice hike.

    Just started picking up archery and shooting (handguns) because I feel like those two things are both cool and useful. I plan on trying to bow hunt at least once in my life when I’m older, and being accurate and skilled with a handgun is extremely useful in the times we live in. Never know when you’ll need it.

    Pick up whatever seems fun and useful! Cooking is great, martial arts can be useful, painting and drawing are good for expression, doesn’t really matter what you wanna do at the end of the day!

  6. Motocross is something I have done since I was four years old, but in the past couple years I have really taken a love for aquariums, I like nature a lot, I can replicate nature and have it in my home.

    I can have a coral reef, a rocky ledge full of cichlids from lake Malawi, or an Amazon river themed tank with lots of live plants and tannin stained water.

    Then I can sit and watch the schools of fish interact, the snails mow down algae, and notice new growth in my plants. It truly is a very peaceful hobby.

  7. For a start, don’t pressure yourself into thinking you have to rush back to normality. You’ve got emotions like anybody else and it’s a hard thing to leave a relationship, so give yourself some time and don’t stress thinking about what you think you “should” be doing.

    But personally, music is everything for me. There’s a song for every mood, feeling, and thought you’ll have. I think listening counts as a hobby, and there’s really a lot of meaning behind some songs. Sometimes it’s comfort knowing you’re not alone in how you feel, sometimes it’s knowledge from a person who’s been in your shoes. Some music hits you right where it hurts, but at the same time, it’s like hearing your thoughts put into words. Getting stuff off your chest kind of, so it doesn’t feel so bottled up inside, you know? If you want some sad stuff:

    [Who’s Gonna Save My Soul](, about heartbreak and the dependency we feel from it.

    [Million Dollar Bill](, the thoughts we have when we miss the one we love.

  8. Think about something that when you see other people doing it, you wish you could do it, or were “cool like them” or something. I used to think people who could play guitar were so cool, so I decided to learn guitar. I also always thought people who skate were cooler than me, so I’m learning to skateboard right now.

    It’s simple, but effective in giving you fulfilling hobbies

  9. get a project car. dont buy a unfinished project, because if you dont know what your doing it will frustrate you.

    buy a mazda miata/mx5. cheap to buy, easy to fix go onto youtube and type in the money pit. they are rebuilding a miata: what a coinsidence!

  10. Some of the best advice I ever heard was: “Get 3 hobbies, one to keep you physically active, one to express yourself creatively, and one to make you social. If one hobby checks multiple boxes, that’s even better.” I don’t know if that’s a famous quote or if someone just said it off the cuff once on brisbane, but it really stuck with me.

    Set some physical goal for yourself. Maybe it’s running a marathon, maybe it’s lifting your own body weight, maybe it’s riding a unicycle to work every morning. It doesn’t matter what it is, just having a goal that’s not immediately obtainable but gives you something to work towards will help give you some direction.

    Also, find a way to be creative. Maybe buy a recorder or ocarina and learn to play all the Disney songs, or grab some paints and follow along with Bob Ross, or write plays about your dreams, or film some claymation, or build tiny furniture out of XPS foam. Just something that requires your imagination. Even if you don’t currently know how to play whatever instrument or how to paint, just get started and get yourself onto another medium.

    Finding a social hobby is probably going to be the hardest one right now. I would recommend some sort of goal-oriented video game with voice chat. I started playing VR paintball when quarantine started, and that was incredibly helpful for me. You might also want to look into joining an online Dungeons & Dragons game (check out r/lfg to find a group). Your goal is to find something that requires you to actually talk with other people. Chatrooms and forums are fine, but you really want to make sure you’re engaging your voice, and hearing other people’s voices.

    If you get those hobbies, *and set personal goals for yourself in each hobby*, you’ll be more fulfilled. I would say try to do each hobby for at least 30 minutes a day, and if after about a month you don’t like it, then try switching to a different hobby in the same kind of category. Eventually, you’ll rediscover what you like.

  11. The most common will probably be exercise. Definitely important for a healthy life.

    The second will be find you/what you like. Very rewarding best found by exploring many different avenues at once. (watch Yes Man with Jim Carey)

    The third is do what you enjoyed doing with her- because you enjoyed it, thereby “ripping the band-aid off”.

    I’ll add, (because these are all great, but you have to be committed to them) sit and be still for a while. Just listen.

  12. History and really anything that happened before yesterday.

    Started with dinosaurs as a toddler, got some books on cavemen around 1st grade and got a massive world history book in second grade. From there I was hooked.

    I’m 28 now and getting a masters in teaching with a focus on history and social studies. I’ll try and commit three or four years to teaching my subject and I’ll see if I want to do a PhD afterwards. I literally get the same feeling from talking about history that I get from sex or some choice drugs.

  13. I cook, it’s a hobby and career.

    i also play guitar and bass. I’m a bit of history buff, i could kill a day just watching videos about history, geography, movie and music analysis video essays, etc.

    if you really don’t feel like you have a fulfilling hobby or interest then i’d say try to look for one that seems to have a good community surrounding it.

  14. Lacrosse and reading. I take my stick, gloves, and ball anywhere I go. I can usually find a goal in the U.S, and I can find a brick wall to play wallball anywhere. As for reading, welll, bookstores are a pretty global thing. One hobby for the body, one for the mind.

  15. I restarted playing rugby after my breakup. That helped a lot because rugby is a community where I was able to make a lot of new friends. Plus, its hard to focus on exes when you’re busy smashing somone’s teeth in.

    So, I definitely recommend picking up team sport. I also like to tinker with my computer a lot. and I write a bit, but writing is more difficult because I always feel like it needs to be shared with people.

  16. The hobby that I’ve had the longest would be R/C cars. I did gas electric, I did 1/10 scale and 1/8 scale all were enjoyable. I was into rc since I was a teenager, I remember my 1st rc was called the Frogger by Tamiya.

  17. I don’t know that I would call it lifelong but I started wood working a few months ago and it’s something that I plan on doing for the rest of my life, assuming I keep all my fingers. It’s pretty expensive to start but it’s very rewarding

  18. Photography! 23 years and counting 😬

    Yes, there was a dormant period for some years but the passion never left so when I picked up the camera again it gave me the same energy that it used to.

  19. I’m sort of the same, I can’t seem to get myself to pick up a consistent hobby by my own merit, I’ve played piano for about 4 years and it’s really because I am expected to continue it.

    I really struggle to even get out of bed somedays, so in general hobbies are hard for me to keep up with.

    I’ve recently picked up skateboarding and it’s actually worked out really well because I’m able to bring my board everytime I hang out with my friends; it’s easier to practice skating when I’m already out with my board rather than finding a specific time and place to practice.

  20. Just do stuff. Anything. Everything you can think of. Ask other people their hobbies and try them out. Learn about people you admire and see what they are into and why. Unless something actively repulses you, just do it and don’t think twice about it. You’ll know what you like when you want to do it again.

    Also don’t be afraid to drop a hobby and move on to something else. You learn from everything you do, and you can always come back to something later. Don’t wait for the perfect hobby to come along, you won’t know what you love until you’re already loving it. Just do stuff!

  21. I’d say hiking. Apart from the exercise, when you’re walking and just doing the same action over and over in the woods you inevitably end up doing some introspection, which is nice.

  22. I’ve got a couple I guess

    I’ve been working with electronics since around middle school, I’m in college for it now, so that one’s been around for a while. Getting an arduino kit with a bunch of sensors provides many opportunities for learning, although it can be pretty easy to get bored if you don’t have some practical purpose for your projects.

    I also like building and flying RC airplanes, and I’m starting to get into multirotors for a club I’m in. They provide a nice platform for integrating electronics projects and they’re just kinda neat

  23. Investing in general. Everytime i feel like i know how investing works, something new happens or some new article teaches me something new. And its really enjoyable seeing how u can grow a small sum into something substantial in the future

  24. Have you considered getting a pet (if you dont have one)?

    Cats are fuggin great.

    Its not all rainbows and lolipops but still sooo worth it. Last night my cat was kind of a menace at bedtime but other than that shes a sweetheart.

    As for hobbies, have you considered getting into chess?

    Its honestly about the most perfect game to get into. “SKILL GAP” is what gives these games longevity and chess has it to the most extreme level. The potential ‘top end’ of skill is honestly almost beyond comprehension. So take this HUGE skill gap (aka the reason to play and feel rewarded for getting better) and combine it with the picture perfect ranking system that ALL ‘competitive’ games try to emulate (but never really can); and you have essentially one of the most perfect, elegant, worthwhile games you could be playing.

    []( has a free mobile app. Or you can play on their website. Strongly recommend.

    As for other games Counterstrike Global Offensive is about the same as chess. Massive skill gap, rewarding to learn. Def could recommend both of these.

  25. I’ve stayed 12 years (and counting) enrolled in a community that has fun with modding Super Mario World games. Yes, the good ol’ 90s game is actively getting modded, and a growing number of users learn how to operate the assembler language that’s associated with Super Nintendo chips. There also are the music sections, the graphics sections.

    You can find it [here]( lol.

  26. Overall music is my life long hobby anything like collecting music, Discovering and listening to albums on daily basis, spending money on Audio Equipment… And I also play drums, I put lots of hours into practice and also some money on gear… Practicing drums and getting better and better, working towards the next goal, Going through the drum books and learning my favourite songs and drum parts takes up most of my free time. I also have a teacher who gives me lessons every week.

    So yeah, music. Been with me since I was like 12 and will stay with me forever specially once I start working as a drummer and start playing with other musicians. Music is so integrated in my life that’s it’s just inseparable from who I am. And I’m really glad I have such a passionate hobby. I really don’t see how I can even live without it.

    Tho I gotta say spending money on Drum gear and Good Audiophile equipment has taken a huge toll on my wallet

  27. Skateboarding. I started skateboarding when I was ~12 and have been doing it ever since. Even during the times I did skate for long periods of time, it never really left me. My girlfriend really likes the fact I skate and knows it’s one of my passions, so she’s very encouraging of it. I don’t think I’ll ever give it up completely and hope to one day be able to introduce it to my children, hoping they’ll take to it. It’s exciting to think about being able to skate with my kids, but if they don’t, it’s all good.

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