I told my BF (25M) that if I become a parent I would prefer to be a SAHM while the kid is young. He and I were both raised by SAHM and it is something I prefer as I did not have a stable parent figure during my younger years, which definitely messed me up. I want to make sure if I have a kid that I am there for them, especially when they are young.
I think my BF does not really understand what it is like to even be around kids, especially babies/toddlers. He was raised in a way where even though he was the oldest of 3, he was never responsible for his siblings, ever, so he was raised more closer to the way an only child was raised, imo. I am the oldest of 3, the youngest being 10 years younger than me. I remember very clearly having to change baby diapers, feedings, watching them closely when they learned to walk as they would literally touch everything. BF thinks being a SAHM will be so easy that he would not be expected to come home and do any cleaning at all or do any “chores.” I don’t think he realizes how stressful it is when kids are just babies. He thinks you can just plop them in front of a TV and they’ll just stay there. I tried to explain to him that is not the case and that he should be helping out no matter what. I think he just wants to be the cool parent who is never the bad guy because he wouldn’t want to say No to them, only having fun. I think he is going to be in for a rude awakening if he ever becomes a parent. But he makes a really high salary so he can easily afford to hire help if needed, so he won’t ever have to lift a finger if he doesn’t want to.
What is it really like being a parent, being the breadwinner? How do you split “chore”/housework/parenting? Do you help out around the house after you come back from work? What about on your days off, do you do any housework then?