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What do mature guys think about girls who’ve never dated?

Im 19 in college and I’ve never been in a relationship. Is that a turn off? Does that make guys see me differently or make me seem weird?

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48 Comments

  1. Well if they are truly a mature guy then they will probably think you were uninterested or too busy for a relationship. Now we don’t know you but there are many personality features that would make it clear why you choose not to or why guys would choose not to engage a relationship with you.

  2. Not weird per se. My assumption would be that such a person is either very introverted or very driven in some field of work or study. Possibly some combination of both. Neither of those are inherently bad, and wouldn’t preclude my taking an interest.

  3. When you are 38 and still have this issue then you should ask this question. Please don’t define your life by who you dated when. Make more friends first before you start getting into major relationships

  4. I operate under a “don’t ask don’t tell” protocol when it comes to previous partners. As far as in concerned it’s not really my business and only more harm than good can come from knowing.

  5. Nope, not a turn off at all nor is it weird. Everybody rolls at different speeds, so it’s not really a big deal. Don’t worry about what anybody thinks or might think and just worry about what you think is right. Have fun in college.

  6. My wife was 22 when we started dating and I was her first boyfriend. As with anything that feels out of the ordinary, I’m sure there would be questions about why, but on the surface, there’s no issue with it.

  7. Less is more in this case. It’s better to be on this end of the spectrum compared to the other when it comes to relationships.

    Most guys don’t want a woman with tons of pervious partners. You’ll be fine op, the large majority of guy’s will feel a sense of relief. This is a turn on.

  8. At 19, never been in a relationship, that’s not a huge deal oh, it’s definitely something I would keep a note of but not a big deal now if you get to like 25 26 27 and still never been in a relationship , that’s when it gets in the red flag territory for me

  9. Can’t judge a book by a line from a random page.
    I can’t form an opinion on her without getting to know her as a person, mentally AND physically.

    I guess that was just a fancy way of trying to say that dating experience has zero effect in forming my opinion about a person.

  10. It makes you seem sweet but also impressionable. There are pros and cons to this. But it doesn’t ultimately change anything, you are still a unique individual who will do exactly what you want to in a relationship. You just might not know what you want in your partner.

  11. If you’re 27 and haven’t had an ltr, the cause for concern is, shit, _I’m_ going to have to be the one who helps you through maturing emotionally.

    Never had a therapist? Don’t know how to communicate? Don’t know what’s worth fighting about and what’s not? Are you toxically jealous? Do you know yourself? Do you self reflect? Do you know how to deescalate? Do you know how to compromise?

    If you’ve never had an ltr, you probably don’t have the experience and emotional growth that comes with long term relationships, and knowing that about someone, I’m not sure I want to roll the dice and soend years with a gal while Ibget older and she kearns all these kessons the hard way from a breaking up with me and then reamizing she had it good && then treating the next partner good so she doesn’t lose him. She’d have to be super smart and kind and good looking to make it worth my time these days.

    My girl now had to grow up real fucking fast, and sometimes I still come home to all her bags packed, her friend called, and she is just hanging out to give me closure before she leaves for good. Only at that point in time, when her mind is made up, is it apparent she wants to talk about something. I don’t need that. Just fucking stop assuming and _talk_ to me when there’s an issue. People without mistakes to reflect on, or who are never wrong, don’t have this self-reflective experience tonmake them a more stable long term partner.

  12. There’s a difference between being 19 and never been in a relationship and never been on a date. If you have never been in a relationship not a huge deal. If you never been on a date, it’s not a red flag yet but get out there and date anyone you can. Don’t wait for mr perfect to go on your first date because you will never have mr perfect before going on a date with them cause you don’t know them.

    And as you age it gets worse and worse. At my current age (36) the last thing I would do is date someone who has never been in a relationship. They have too much to learn and I’m not longer at a point in my life where I’m willing to teach someone how to be in a relationship. My gf would also be pissed.

  13. I’m mature and I’d fuck just about any 19 year old messed up enough to say yes. /s

    But seriously, it doesn’t make a lot of difference but there are some surprises you’re in for that guys who have had a lot of experience might want to avoid.

    I suggest dating nice boys (and old men LOL)

  14. Well I’ll let you be the judge if I qualify as mature or not.

    I am a 29 year old man, who has had 1 break up, 3 fwbs, a degree in math and computer science, am 85k/ year salary, and 3 friend circles I regularly meet with to socialize.

    So as somebody who is dating a girl with no dating experience prior to, it definitely causes a lot of anxiety. The big thing that scares me is she may think she knows what she’s comfortable with or not, but you never know until you try. I am terrified to be the one who she tries a sexual act with first because even though she consents, she doesn’t really know that she’s into this until it’s already too late. It takes a lot of trust from both of us to really make sure we are okay with whatever we do.

  15. I’m only 25, so I don’t think I’m the ideal of maturity. If you’re asking about more middle aged or even grey haired men, I can’t speak for them, but I wouldn’t assume they have good intentions if they’re with someone young enough to be their daughter.

    Almost everyone I know had lost their virginities before graduating highschool. I assume the same of strangers. With that assumption in mind, I’d be curious to why you may have had more sexual partners than relationships. Why has no man wanted a relationship with you but they have wanted to get in your pants? Why were you more interested in getting in a guy’s pants than something more serious with them?

    Was it entirely circumstance that kept you single? Are you studying diligently and don’t have time for dating? Are you an awful person to be around? Does your daily life, work, studies, hobbies, etc etc have 0 single men in it that you’d consider dating? Is it a demographics issue? Can’t find a guy in an acceptable age range? Can’t find a guy with similar goals? Can’t find a guy who’s not an immature shithead? Does your church or religion not allow you to date others who don’t share your faith? Are you into guys of a different ethnicity than the ones who live in your area? Have you recently moved abroad for schooling and came from a culture where 19 and never dated is normal? Are you 200cm tall and only want to be with a guy who’s taller than you? Did your parents send you to all girls schools until you finished highschool?

    There’s lots of reasons to have never had a relationship at 19. Some normal, some not. Some can be due to circumstance, some can be because of you. Each man will view your reason/reasons differently. For some men it might be fine, others it may be a dealbreaker.

    Were I single and matched with a 19 year old, I likely wouldn’t suspect you had never dated unless you mentioned it, or seemed extremely clueless. At which point I might just ask to get a straight answer from you. General small talk would also give me some insight to why you may not have dated before.

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