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Men of brisbane: what is the reasoning behind being hot and cold with a girl in the early stages of dating?

Men of brisbane: what is the reasoning behind being hot and cold with a girl in the early stages of dating?

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  1. I used to be the kind of guy who would scare girls off by being way too interested at first, so in the past I’ve successfully used the “hot & cold” approach to keep this from happening. The illusion of social status is omni-present in the beginning stages of dating, and the quickest way to allude to a high social status is to convey the message “You’re *almost* good enough for my undivided attention”. Women, being the gatekeepers of reproduction and sexual activity, are often caught off guard by this approach and are (more often than not) helplessly intrigued. This is where we get the common trope of “the nice guy never gets the girl”, since the average woman will chose the mysteriously distant man over the softie that throws himself at her feet and worships her. It is human nature to covet what you can’t have over what is readily available.

    Is this a morally sound strategy to build meaningful relationships with women? No. Is this a universal concept that applies to women as a whole? Definitely not. The above listed explanation is just my reasoning for any time I’ve successfully employed this method.

  2. Some men have unstable attachment styles, which requires therapy honestly.

    I don’t intentionally do the hot/cold stuff, but in the early stages I take it slow if I think there’s something serious there. So he may just be evaluating things and specifically NOT trying to rush, or he may have some issues to work out.

    IMO take it slow and see how it goes.

  3. I’m going to give you a long time well known guy secret and its called the rule of 3

    Every time i or anyone i know have started dating a girl and can tell she is getting ready to ask be to her bf… they appear… options 2 and 3.

    **(((NOTE: if you arent attractive, outgoing, and confident this will not happen to you))**

    As soon as I’m about to make it ‘fb official’ 2 girls come out of no where and immediately want in the mix. Like i purse girl 1 but girls 2 and 3 pursue me. And girls 2 and 3 always seem to follow this formula:

    *Girl 2* will be the quiet so fun good girl who you arent sure if she is just friend or not and she is a super flight/flake risk, shes actually super insecure but seems amazing until you give her direct attention, then she runs, she probably also has a bf (ie Girl 2 is a tiktok or insta-whore)

    and *Girl 3* will be the bad girl whos life is a fucking mess shes dark, maybe goth if youre lucky and super hot but in need of a guy saving her from herself. You will have to take it slow and make her feel super special because shes def been a victim of sexual assault at some point.

    ***Here is where guys fuck up… they always choose option 2 … so when you say a guy is cold on you its because he is now going after option 2 which is most likely option 1s friend, not best but more frienemies. NEVER CHOOSE OPTION 2 she will always leave you, ALWAYS!!***

    **So ladies if you are wondering why the description that we gave our mom doesn’t match you…this is why lol its not you its one of the others in the line up.**

    So if you are a girl reading this you are probably triggered at this point, and im sorry but this is just how life is. Girls can tell when guys have that little extra bounce in their step and they immediately want them. The trick then is always choosing the girl that ‘needs a hero’ or just sticking with option 1

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