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How far would you reasonably travel for a date?

I’ve recently decided to try online dating services and found that the only people even close to someone I would date are quite far away. I’m just curious what everyone would think is reasonable for a date.

I live in the Midwest US so sometimes finding someone is a challenge. I feel like an hour’s drive or less is correct but everyone I match with is 3-4hrs away. It would also depend on what you’re doing I suppose so I would say a traditional dinner and a movie/activity kind of date. An online date is a thing given the state of the world too but that’s not really what I’m talking about.

Thoughts?

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25 Comments

  1. If she was more then an hour away I’d need to talk to her for quite abit online and make sure we’re really hitting it off before I feel like it’s worth it to go. I’m not driving 3 hours just to have an awkward cup of coffee then never see her again.

  2. I’ll put it this way: For the right person, I’ll travel to China and back, provided I can afford the trip.

    But the further away she is, the better she’s gotta be. My lady from China has gotta be pretty damn amazing.

  3. What ever you decide is close enough to do it make her meet you half way. It will at least show you her amount of interest. Obviously other things have to be considered, if she lives in a city that has lots of things to do you’re not going to have her meet you at a truck stop for coffee but do try to find something half way or maybe a little closer to her so you can gauge her commitment. That will weed out most of the foodie calls.

  4. An hour tops with rare exceptions. I’d only accept a match farther than that if I thought the girl was extremely attractive and we’d have to really hit it off over text for me to make a trip over an hour to see her for a date.

    I can’t imagine traveling 3 hours for a date unless it was with someone I already know and had spent time with and was interested in.

  5. Local date, coffee or drinks
    1 hr away, dinner or movie or concert
    More than that, usually book a hotel for 2 nights. Night 1 I usually get there late and just crash. Next day a whole day of dating. Something like sightseeing, boat excursion, ball game. If things seem to be moving, plan dinner and some night life. If not moving, I usually just bail!
    I’ve dated half way around the World. Was a Pilot and visited the area a lot? Kinda like a weekend date. Most of the time it was at least interesting?

  6. Ahh yes, the GUDs (geographically Undesirables). I also have experience online dating in the Midwest, and found the same frustrations seeing women I would be interested in dating be 1-2 hour drives. My tolerance maxed out at about 1 hour though, and met a few that way. Having made some of those drives, it gets old VERY quickly. Even 30 minutes is a pain if you hit it off and want to get together a lot. If you have options, stay close. If not, be prepared for negotiating who travels. It may cause problems after the initial newness wears off.

  7. 45 minutes without a second’s thought; 60 minutes if I think we might be a really good match.

    Only exception is that I will not cross the Hudson River. All the dating sites suck if you live in North Jersey because you keep getting matched with people in Manhattan and Brooklyn. It may be close if you’re drawing a radius around me, but it’s a pain in the ass trip (and likewise, people living in the city usually have no interest in dating someone who lives in Jersey, especially considering I’m never moving back to NYC)

  8. Well, my current partners/FWBs live 250, 300, 700 and 2600 km away. So…yeah. Still very much worth it. Obviously i don’t go there for a “date”, but rather a full weekend or week at a time. Or they come to me.

  9. I met my girlfriend online and she lives 9 hours away

    it’s been incredibly worth it and rewarding and wouldn’t trade her for anyone. Statistically the chance that the person you’re meant to be with just happens to live 10 minutes away from you is next to nothing.

  10. On a dating app, I’d only travel more than 30 minutes if I was feeling *really* lonely. I wouldn’t travel an hour to see someone unless it was for a whole weekend.

    But I live in a city, so maybe my desperation just hasn’t spiked quite so high as it would in a less populated area.

  11. An hour hour away when we first met two hours away now thanks to covid. My friend introduced me to his sister-in-law at an Easter bbq and we text for a while. I told my buddy (not the same one who introduced us) I’d give it a few dates at an hour drive and see if it was worth the drive. After the first date I knew it was.

  12. I live in Chicago and the joke is you don’t date outside of your neighborhood, and while it’s a joke it’s pretty true. I wouldn’t date anyone who lived more than 20 minutes and no more than 15 minutes walking is what I would prefer.

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