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How do you stop yourself from feeling sorry for yourself?

Edit: thank you for all your replies. So, I need to start taking accountability for my own happiness, I will start to talk more positively to myself, be grateful for what I have. Understand why I feel sorry for myself and understand what to do over come it. So thank you.

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14 Comments

  1. TL;DR: Suck it up and move on.
    Noone is going to feel sorry for you, so why should you? Everyone else has their problems, and whatever your going through has little to no significance to them.
    I used to feel sorry for myself and it did nothing but prolong the pain. I wasted alot of time on misery and could have been doing so much more with my life. You have to put on your big boy pants and continue on with life at some point; why not now? Go to the gym, take a bike ride, take a walk/run: get active. Start a hobby, explore a new place try a new recipe: do something different to transition to the “life goes on” mentality. It took me a while to “transition.” After I found out that noone is coming to save me and life gets better, I realized I control my happiness and ultimately my success in life.
    There are services out there that can help, if you are seeing yourself at a point where you cannot do it on your own then ask for help. I know it could be viewed as weak, but even the strong don’t have all the answers.
    I am in the military and I am in behavioral health. I may not have the highest rank, but I have seen senior Officers in the office there and they took the step to ask for help, so that does mean something.
    If needed be PM me, I have resources and you will have the added bonus of anonymity. If I don’t have an answer I can help work to find one.

  2. Acknowledge your pain, understand why you feel it, whether it be due to new situation or a chronic issue–this may require a mental health counselor to act as a soundboard to help you fully understand yourself and your pain. I would advise finding a counselor to professionally walk you through these feelings, but in the meantime, you must question yourself when you begin feeling like a victim of life and try to think of certain advantages you may have in life, like a good mind, your health, or other things you’re grateful for. You must be aware of your emotions and thought content by being mindful, and mould your thoughts in a way that is empowering to you. The explanation of the solution is simple, but committing to monitoring your own thoughts can be difficult, but I know you can overcome this feeling. I wish you the best.

  3. Through mindfulness and self talk. I try to be aware of when I’m self pitying. Then I self talk something positive.

    Ill give you an example, at this point in my life I have to work a pretty insane schedule. Its temporary but can be unpleasant. And sometimes before work I want to feel sorry for myself about having to go to work. But when I realize I’m doing that I tell myself that I chose to do this. That I am working towards my goals and that this is temporary. And that I’m the kind of person that is willing to take the difficult path to get to where I want to be.

    That makes me feel 100 times better than thinking “I hate having to work so much. I wish I could stay home and do nothing blah blah.”

  4. Knowing there’s about 7 billion people on the planet who don’t have the opportunities I have, or the resources to do much about their situations.

    And yet plenty of them struggle along and find happiness anyway.

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