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How do you move on from a crush on your best girl friend while still remaining best friends?

For context, me and this girl met at work 2 months ago and we quickly became great friends and we have incredible chemistry together. About a month ago I told her that I caught feelings for her but she told me she only wanted a friend. But since then we became so close that she let’s me see her naked or she let’s me touch her ass and tits like she’s my girlfriend. She loves when I kiss her but she doesn’t reciprocate. I still want to be friends with her but everybody tells me to stop talking to her and move on. What should I do?

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9 Comments

  1. >she let’s me see her naked or she let’s me touch her ass and tits like she’s my girlfriend. She loves when I kiss her but she doesn’t reciprocate.

    This is not just friends, because this is not platonic. I dunno what she’s getting out of this deal, but you can’t move on from your crush while getting handsy.

    Distance, both physical and emotional, is your best bet if you wanna get past the feels.

    Alternately, you can just deal with the feels and enjoy the arrangement.

    I caught feels for my FWB a while back, but knew we weren’t compatible, romantically. I never said anything, I just continued enjoying the sex. Eventually, she caught feels, couldn’t deal, and had to pull back.

    We all handle this stuff differently..I don’t think the way you’re handling it suits you, but maybe.

  2. That doesn’t sound like a friend. Personally, i recommended backing off to only friendly activities. No more couply things. No naked, no kiss, no ass or boobs. If she asks why you stopped, say that it keeps making you think youre more than you are. Either she’ll miss what she had, or she’ll accept it. This’ll make moving on easier. You can still talk and be besties, but it drops any tension

  3. My dude you are getting strung along so badly!

    Tell her that due to your feelings you need to take a break from seeing her for a while. If she truely is only interested in being friends she will understand and infact even encourage it.

    If she doesn’t encourage it then you know for sure, 100%, undoutably that she is fucking you around.

    Also you can do better than a girl like that frankly. Imagine friendzoning a guy and then keeping him interested like that. she has issues bruh.

  4. Honestly, if you have to ask, you probably can’t do it like that.

    Also. This girl has some extreme red flags about what she apparently thinks is appropriate behavior between friends and how she thinks it is OK to treat someone with unrequited romantic interest in herself.

  5. >What should I do?

    Move on. I don’t think it’s possible for me, or easy for anyone to be “just friends” with a girl you’re attracted to. She’s telling you she doesn’t want anything more and then her behavior is leading you to believe otherwise. That’s not nice of her.

    Tell her you want something more serious, because it’s too difficult to be around her all the time knowing you can never have her, then cut her off. Seriously.

  6. So, to answer your question directly – You spend a little time apart and start treating her as a friend equivalent to your other friends. Don’t cancel plans for her, have her texts wait until you are free, etc.

    I’m 30, and have had a lot of rejections. Personally, I can do this rather easily. But backing off and making sure you have your space is sorta key.

    But your context brings up a whole other can of worms. Having her be okay seeing her naked. This is confusing. In what context is she undressing in front of you? I’m friends with several females. The only time I’ve ever seen one of them topless one-on-one is when she couldn’t get her sports bra off and needed assistance.

    As others have stated, what this sounds like is some manipulation. She likes you wanting her, will tease and enjoy the luxuries of having you as a boy toy until she finds someone she actually likes. I wouldn’t put up with it. If you can’t separate your feelings, then back away. It’s safer for your sanity.

  7. She’s using you for validation. A lot of guys stick around because something is better than nothing in their minds.

    As long as you know she’s using you for validation, you’ll be able to operate better. But if you stick around you’re staying for the validation too. Which isn’t a bad thing. It’s just all about self awareness. She’s not self aware but as long as you stick around, she doesn’t have to be.

  8. Any and all “friendship” between a straight man and straight woman begins with either lust or subconscious desire looking forward to a relationship on one side or another while trying to rationalize it as only being friends if both are single and never met before.

    The fact you realized you were attracted to her was just you coming aware of your end of it and she probably began to realize the same towards you but tries to “remain friends” not to lose what first seemed like a platonic friendship.

    Sorry to be the bearer of bad news but there is no such thing as a platonic friendship like that : you’re just in the middle of what was inevitably going to happen.

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