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I just woke up from a dream where I had lost my wedding ring.. and I woke up panicked/sad. It’s still on my finger so I cuddled my wife and all was made right again.
Saying I’m in love with my wife isn’t enough for me. It doesn’t feel right. It feels shallow and like I should be swept away in a hot Hollywood-esque romance.
My wife /is/ love. When I think of love, I think of her face. I think of her and her embrace and her softness and her voice. It’s being calm and safe.
Based on some of your comments here, it seems like you don’t trust your feelings, so here’s a tip:
Write down two lists side by side: one for what is good about her and one for what is bad about her. Don’t include anything to do with her looks or sex; only focus on her personality and character.
If you have a long good list and a short bad list with nothing awful on it (e.g. abusive behaviours), it’s the real deal and you can trust your feelings.
P.S. If you’ve only been dating for a short time (days or a few weeks), it’s not love, it’s infatuation.
When thoughts of her creep into my head regularly. When I see something that reminds me of her or a shared inside joke between us. When I hear love songs and think of her which is followed by an urge of me wanting to take her out dancing. When I find myself wanting to give her the best of what I can, even at my own expense. That last one is dangerous though because there are people that will take advantage of you so don’t do that unless it’s reciprocated
I don’t know if its a feeling or something, I just kinda ‘knew’. I know that’s a bit vague but I’ll share my story.
Was working a remote construction job in northern Alberta. Small site, not much safety presence and very cowboy mentality to get er done.
I was tasked with some particularly sketchy shit as I was an apprentice and it was expected I’ll just keep my mouth shut and do it. No Journeyman would touch it.
As I was doing the math in my head and thinking about all the shit that could go wrong and how many ways I could get killed doing this, my thoughts immediately went to my girlfriend (at the time). Not my parents, not my friends or my little brother. My first thought was her.
I dropped my tools, used my right to refuse unsafe work, got into a screaming match with my foreman and subsequently walked off site.
After the 16 hour bus ride home I made love with that woman like it was my last night on death row.
The feeling of being in love, limerence, is fleeting. It is also shallow. It feels good, certainly, and can bind people for a time.
Loving someone is deeper, choosing them over yourself, and doing great things because you choose them. This type of love is a decision that you make, along with discipline to carry out your choice even when difficult.
When no matter what happens, you find them. If you’ve been away for a long time, you always come back to them somehow.
I have 2 friends that I love dearly. We have taken breaks from talking but somehow, by an odd coincidence of sorts, we meet in random circumstances. A shared college class, a shared workplace, seeing each other at a store neither of us frequent. We just *know*.
I’m of the opinion that love isn’t really a ‘feeling’ so much as it’s a choice. Anyone can love anyone if they choose to, it’s finding the qualities, attitude and compatibility in another person that suits what you want and need that makes all the difference.
This becomes more apparent in marriage as time goes on and the warm and fuzzy feelings start to fade away. Maintaining your commitments to that person becomes an exercise in discipline, integrity and duty…for the benefit of your partner, your children and yourself.
Love is like a fire. Anybody can light a fire, but it takes work to keep it burning. You have to keep it going when it rains, snows, and the wind blows. But if you keep it going it will keep you warm and safe through the cold, wet, and dark. You know your in love when your ready to work it.
As I tell my wife at times when my feelings are overwhelming and my heart feels so intense, I tell her that words fail me and are not adequate to tell her how much I love her.
If they are on your mind all the time. When the mere thought of being with them makes you tingle. When your heart beats out of your chest when you meet them. When you feel more alive than you ever have before. Then, and only then, will you truly be in love.
Perhaps it only happens when you are very young.. I’ve yet to find out that part yet.
I just woke up from a dream where I had lost my wedding ring.. and I woke up panicked/sad. It’s still on my finger so I cuddled my wife and all was made right again.
You’ll know it.
Saying I’m in love with my wife isn’t enough for me. It doesn’t feel right. It feels shallow and like I should be swept away in a hot Hollywood-esque romance.
My wife /is/ love. When I think of love, I think of her face. I think of her and her embrace and her softness and her voice. It’s being calm and safe.
Nothing else has even come close.
Based on some of your comments here, it seems like you don’t trust your feelings, so here’s a tip:
Write down two lists side by side: one for what is good about her and one for what is bad about her. Don’t include anything to do with her looks or sex; only focus on her personality and character.
If you have a long good list and a short bad list with nothing awful on it (e.g. abusive behaviours), it’s the real deal and you can trust your feelings.
P.S. If you’ve only been dating for a short time (days or a few weeks), it’s not love, it’s infatuation.
When it hurts
When just holding them makes sadness, anxiety and pain fade away.
When you want what’s best for her even if its at the expense of you
Probably if I ever meet someone I like enough to get me consistently off Reddit
You just know. It can’t be explained. If you’re questioning it…you aren’t.
When thoughts of her creep into my head regularly. When I see something that reminds me of her or a shared inside joke between us. When I hear love songs and think of her which is followed by an urge of me wanting to take her out dancing. When I find myself wanting to give her the best of what I can, even at my own expense. That last one is dangerous though because there are people that will take advantage of you so don’t do that unless it’s reciprocated
I don’t know if its a feeling or something, I just kinda ‘knew’. I know that’s a bit vague but I’ll share my story.
Was working a remote construction job in northern Alberta. Small site, not much safety presence and very cowboy mentality to get er done.
I was tasked with some particularly sketchy shit as I was an apprentice and it was expected I’ll just keep my mouth shut and do it. No Journeyman would touch it.
As I was doing the math in my head and thinking about all the shit that could go wrong and how many ways I could get killed doing this, my thoughts immediately went to my girlfriend (at the time). Not my parents, not my friends or my little brother. My first thought was her.
I dropped my tools, used my right to refuse unsafe work, got into a screaming match with my foreman and subsequently walked off site.
After the 16 hour bus ride home I made love with that woman like it was my last night on death row.
Lots of kinds of love.
The feeling of being in love, limerence, is fleeting. It is also shallow. It feels good, certainly, and can bind people for a time.
Loving someone is deeper, choosing them over yourself, and doing great things because you choose them. This type of love is a decision that you make, along with discipline to carry out your choice even when difficult.
When you’re willing to sacrifice your own happiness, comfort, or plans so they can be happy, comfortable, or achieve what they want.
And you expect nothing in return.
you just know ive never been able to put it in words you really cant. you’ll know
When you open the garage door and the first thing that happens is you smile before you’ve even started the bike
When we broke up 😀
When no matter what happens, you find them. If you’ve been away for a long time, you always come back to them somehow.
I have 2 friends that I love dearly. We have taken breaks from talking but somehow, by an odd coincidence of sorts, we meet in random circumstances. A shared college class, a shared workplace, seeing each other at a store neither of us frequent. We just *know*.
You feel the warmest hug and that you feel like you are vomiting constantly
When I measure time as being with or without him.
First sign is: you start asking questions like “how do you know you’re in love?” 🙃😊
When just knowing that she is in your life brings clarity to your mind and makes things a little bit easier to go through
Constantly thinking about my gf, and I can also feel the underlying certainty that she’s right for me somehow.
When you hear thier voice when they text you, when you automatically smile at thier texts or thier thought
I’m of the opinion that love isn’t really a ‘feeling’ so much as it’s a choice. Anyone can love anyone if they choose to, it’s finding the qualities, attitude and compatibility in another person that suits what you want and need that makes all the difference.
This becomes more apparent in marriage as time goes on and the warm and fuzzy feelings start to fade away. Maintaining your commitments to that person becomes an exercise in discipline, integrity and duty…for the benefit of your partner, your children and yourself.
I wouldn’t know love if it sat on my face.
You are who you want to be when you are with that person and that person’s happiness and well-being is essential to your own.
When you realize all the times you thought you were don’t even hold a candle to what you have now.
Love is not just passion. It is ok existing without the passion (though it is necessary in varying amounts for a healthy relationship).
When the fiery passion leaves and the love is still there it’s love.
Love is like a fire. Anybody can light a fire, but it takes work to keep it burning. You have to keep it going when it rains, snows, and the wind blows. But if you keep it going it will keep you warm and safe through the cold, wet, and dark. You know your in love when your ready to work it.
If you have to ask you’re still looking, don’t settle.
You want to spend the rest of your lives talking to and knowing each other
When you think of them before going to bed.
Its love when you can’t think of anyone but them. When they do you so good you get off just thinking about them.
When you’re willing to step back from them
When you’re genuinely happy and content.
You just know.
When saying goodbye is the most difficult thing to do
When they leave you for another person and you spend a year wondering what you did wrong instead of rightfully saying fuck them
When it hits you
There’s no checklist or criteria, you just look at them one day or think about them, and just think “damn, I love you”
When I stop checking out other women
you always want to be with him/her. can’t stop thinking about that person.
As I tell my wife at times when my feelings are overwhelming and my heart feels so intense, I tell her that words fail me and are not adequate to tell her how much I love her.
I have a cute little hat on
She feels like home when I hug her
When you know you just know
When your heart beats faster and your mind becomes numb whenever you are with the one.
Every Friday she has a 2 inch ribeye with some buttered mashed potatoes and a pour of whiskey served for me for dinner, that’s how I know I’m in love
When you don’t need yo ask if you’re or not
Do you feel like a doormat?
If they are on your mind all the time. When the mere thought of being with them makes you tingle. When your heart beats out of your chest when you meet them. When you feel more alive than you ever have before. Then, and only then, will you truly be in love.
Perhaps it only happens when you are very young.. I’ve yet to find out that part yet.
Idk you feel cosy when you see them
Try eating butterflies or something idk i never fell in love