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How can I deal with an overly jealous gf ?

We’ve been together for about 3 years. But this last year we haven’t been able to see each other because she had to leave he country for her studies, and hasn’t been able to come back bcs of the pandemic.
So since it’s summer, I go out with some of my friends we organise parties just to have some fun since it’s been over a year without night life nor parties or events.
We’re basically a group of friends, we just throw parties where we’re the only attendants, and it’s usually alot of fun. But my girl has serious problems with that, since there are girls with us but really there is nothing happening.
How can I deal with this ? Am I the one who’s doing something I’m not supposed to do ?

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11 Comments

  1. What about including her at the party via facetime? Send her some party supplies (if possible) her favorite wine/snacks/maybe order her some delivery service – once again if any of that is possible. Maybe theres also a component of feeling like shes being left out. The cheating insecurity is to be expected; you have females (plural) at a house party, the most secure men/women can have small doubts in the back of their mind. I think a small amount of jealousy is healthy, but theres a fine line. Make her feel comfortable, include her sometimes, not suggesting all the time because you need your space with your friends, as she does with hers. Its about finding a compromise, not about entertaining her jealousy, but how to find a middle ground. You guys are still super young, so the emotional intelligence hasnt had time to fully mature. Thats not an insult, just something to consider – especially because she has had experience with someone cheating on her. She probably hasnt been able to fully heal from that emotional violation. Im not implying its your responsibility for the healing process, thats hers. You could also ask her what would make her feel more comfortable or if she has any suggestions.

  2. Set boundaries and treat her harshly when she oversteps them. Don’t be afraid to let her walk herself out the door. While her feelings are important, you still need to be able to live a life that is generally of your choosing. She is there to share it with you, not define it for you.

  3. Is your girlfriend jealous or insecure of your relationship? Has she suspected you in the past of cheating? Is this something she’s expressed she’s had happen to her from any previous relationships? If none of these are true, then you should ask why she is untrustworthy of you to begin with. What is the source of her concern, and does she have any reasonable proposals to mitigate them?

  4. This is the equivalant of when you marry a girl, but she refuses to stop going to bars and clubs with her female friends. You try to tell her to stop, and she says “you insecure small dick nigga”

    If you keep doing this shit, I hope you ready for her to do it to you when you get back home. And you can’t complain about it.

  5. A mans gotta have friends, man. A woman who tries to take that away from you, especially when you don’t have kids or anything like that, isn’t one I’d personally be dating. When you’ve got obligations, like kids, home stuff, etc., then you have to be responsible while also taking care of your mental/social health.

  6. tbh bro, just end it. u will find someone better, she will too. im telling u from experience if u wait around shes gunna cheat on u first, its weird how it works but thats life, shes gunna cheat so she can feel lessbad about the idea of u cheating. which makes no sense ik but to females it does make sense idk how or why but trust

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