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Guide: things to do with friends

If there were two people on earth that would not want to see you hurt, there would be your sweet best friend and your loving boyfriend. At least that was what you used to believe. But now your world is turned upside down when the very same two people are the ones who cause you so much pain. The pain of betrayal from your most trusted individuals are devastating to say the least. You probably are so angry the only thing you can think of is revenge. Calm yourself down as being in a rage will not do yourself any good, not that you can care less about it right now. But here are a few things to ponder that will help calm your nerves and guide you to what the best next steps you can take.

1. There is a joke that says that the best revenge you can do if a woman steals your man is by letting her keep him. The joke may just make fun of men in general, but when you come to think about it, if your boyfriend is capable of betraying and leaving you, he is capable of doing the same to other people. So in a way it is true that the best revenge is to let your ex best friend have him and who knows one day he will leave her too for someone else.

2. Be thankful that you can get rid of the wolves in sheep skins from your life. That girl is obviously not your best friend and that guy is obviously not the love of your life. As hurt as it may be, it is far better to discover that now rather than down the track when you get more comfortable in the relationship and find it harder and more painful to deal with. So take this as a blessing.

3. Learn the lesson. Think back about the relationship and see if you can find anything wrong with it. What drove your ex boyfriend to find someone else. What quality in your girlfriend that he likes that is lacking from you? When you make yourself a better person, it does yourself a favor for your future relationship. It also open the door for reconciliation with your ex boyfriend if you so desired.

4. Forgive and forget. I can almost hear you say “yeah right”. Truth is, holding grudge will not punish them in any way. The only person who gets punished out of it is yourself and you really don’t need anymore beating. If it is impossible to forgive them, at least don’t put anymore negative feelings on them. They really backfires. To the very least you should forgive yourself. You may have done some wrong in your relationship, but the way it turned out is NOT your fault. Allow yourself to grief for a bit, then forget about it and move on.

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5. You may for some reason want to get back together with your ex, for example if you know you have done something terrible that drove him away, and that you could have done differently so he would not leave you. In that case there is strong chance that your ex still loves you and he left only because there is unsolvable problems in your relationship. You can get him to talk to you openly, without your ex best friend of course, and see if it is possible to give the relationship another try. Keep your emotion fully at check though as this is very critical and you don’t want to real your chances.


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