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Fellow gents, what’s the most hurtful thing you’ve overheard someone say about you?

When I was in college, I crushed pretty hard on one of my close girl friends. One day, I heard her say about me, “He’s so awkward and weird, I don’t see how a woman could ever fall in love with him.”

Now in hindsight it doesn’t feel so bad anymore, but at the time it crushed me.

edit after 250 upvotes – I’ve been reading a good amount of your shares. damn. life and some close people have done y’all pretty rough. I’m not minimizing my own pain or anyone else’s, cause each of us found those moments very painful regardless of what was done or said to you at the time. But I’m glad to hear that some of y’all have got the esteem and confidence and maturity to move on and learn. kudos to all of you, y’all are wonderful people and you deserve all the love.

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29 Comments

  1. Threads like these are why I discourage people from the “nobody ever judges you, really” school of reassurance. If they bank on it, they’re always one overheard comment away from their mental defenses falling apart completely. Better to accept that some people are judgy assholes and that their opinion doesn’t matter at all.

  2. I caught a glimpse of two teenage girls laughing and doing that dated signal for disgust(finger pointing into mouth/gag sign) while looking at me.

    I was born with one ear, and had it partway reconstructed as a kid. It looks similar to cauliflower ear, but there is no ear canal.

    It sucked then, but I don’t mind it at all anymore. I consider my ear to be a filter that gives me the amazing ability to find out who I don’t want to associate with sooner than most.

    Saves me time, and for those who just ask me what happened to my ear, I get to have a cool conversation with. I may or may not have lied to a few kids..”You should see the alligator.”

  3. ‘It’s a shame his suicide attempt didn’t work out’.

    We don’t give school-aged kids enough credit for how mean they can be.

    I’m doing much better – when I heard that, instead of being angry, I just agreed.

  4. One day in middle school, the teacher said we were going to have a group project, and naturally everyone instantly formed their groups. I didn’t have any friends, so nobody picked me. When two other groups were each a head short of the recommended member count, they argued over who DIDN’T get me in their group, right in front of me.

    They were literally willing to do more work than necessary so I didn’t join them. The worst part was not knowing why they disliked me so much.

  5. When I was in elementary school I was fat. Not just body fat, but with a great big square head to accentuate my bigness. I didn’t overhear it, but learned from kids on my school bus that my bus driver referred to me as 4×4. Which, is actually pretty hilarious now, but it hurt my feelings then.

    If you care, I hit puberty and had my GLOW UP. Grew like 6 inches, lost all the baby fat and became a reasonably good looking guy over the course of one summer. Not to mention it hit early, so for a year I looked 17 in a class full of boys that looked 11. It was awesome.

    But I’ll tell you, if you’re fat as a kid, you never forget what it was like to be fat. Adults usually don’t insult fat people to their faces, kids don’t hesitate.

  6. I was in the car with a couple female cousins after a long drive. Our moms left the car the get something. While sitting there with my eyes closed because i was trying to sleep, one of them says, “Isn’t TheObelisk ugly?” And then they both giggled.

    Another time i went to a big party event with a male cousin and he introduced me to a group of hot girls. Later he told me that they were like, “He’s your cousin? He’s so ugly.” and that he replied, “Yeah, he knows he’s ugly.”

    Sucks being a late bloomer– highschool aged girls are the meanest people on the planet.

  7. I had slightly worse than Danny Trejo style acne scarring in HS from a rough freshman year. Junior year one of the girls I previously thought was a nice person stopped me in the middle of the school hallway just so she could get a good look at it and then she just walked off, grossed out, without saying a word. I worked route work around town for a few years and younger girls would often be creeped out or laugh at it. Old ladies would stop me in the middle of the street and give me skin care advice. It was pretty gutting and be treated subhuman.

    Women don’t seem to care about the scars as much in my adulthood thankfully. I had to work through some trust issues, but my teens and twenties were absolutely brutal.

  8. Be in a long-term relationship, soon to propose. Dinner alone, pop the question. She says she wanted to be honest; she slept with our neighbour last week.

    Seeya.

  9. I have this tremor (undiagnosed) that has gotten a lot more noticeable from high school to my adult years. And it is as an adult that I constantly get co workers or random people laughing at me when doing a simple task (my tremor gets more noticeable). I’ll be drinking water and someone on the side of me, that I dont bother turning my head for, will laugh and say typical rude stuff like “look at him, he’s shaking.” It didnt bother until I felt my tremor started to hold me back.

  10. This morning I (slender fella) was out for a walk on the university when two girls ran by and started talking shit about the thickness of my legs not even 10ft after passing me. It put a big ol’ smile on my face because those two broads were envious of my thigh gap. 💅

  11. Breaking my back, doing everything I can to keep my store going as an assistant manager I heard my district manager say to my store manager that I would never be a store manager myself because I had no drive. Hired into competitor as a store manager. Screw that place.

  12. I lived in a van for 2 1/2 years. I worked 4-10’s in San Antonio, while I had my own shop in Austin. I would make parts for customers Friday through Sunday, and program them during the week at Starbucks. I couldn’t afford rent on a commercial unit and my apartment, so I chose my business.

    One day after work I pulled up and backed in, with the side doors facing the patio. My laptop was in the back so I grabbed it and exited through the side doors, which gave a view of my bed and other furnishings. I heard a group of young women laughing and one muttered the words loud enough for me to hear, “what a loser.”

  13. “I always thought he was the type of asshole that abused woman”

    ​

    This was from a person who I often helped out with my handyman skills as she was a single mom with no extra income need someone to help with car maintenance call on me, need to fix a hand rail call on me, need some plumbing work, moving etc. I was angry because my ex was baiting me to act aggressively I did not take the bait and proud that I didn’t, too be perceived as an abuser by someone who should have given me some benefit of the doubt cut deep.

    ​

    Till this day I get the occasional call for a hand with….. and I just stoically say no I am not available try my ex maybe she can lend a hand.

  14. In high school, I was hanging out with a buddy at his place when his GF came over. I didn’t like her and didn’t wanna talk to her, so I laid down on his bed, closed my eyes, and pretended to be asleep. She saw me there and told my friend “I don’ think he likes me.” Then she walked closer to me and told my friend “I could play connect-the-dots with his pimples.” Fuck you bitch, that’s why I didn’t like you.

  15. I stopped letting what people say about me get to me lol. I’m super critical of the way I am there isn’t anything anyone can say that I prolly haven’t told myself already. Got no time to be caught up in someone else’s opinion all that matters is how I see myself

  16. One of my former best friends told me I’m to much of a social inept and stupid asshole to get accepted into medical school after I failed to get accepted a few times.

    Jokes on her, not only am I currently in medical school, developing rapport with patients is one of my strong suits.

  17. I heard this girl in middle school calling me “the most ret*rded person in the class.” I didn’t even know her name so I don’t know why she said that. She was saying this to her friend. Joke’s on her because her friend and I have now been close friends for over 2 years.

  18. One day I was walking down the street on my way to work. I passed by a well dressed younger couple that were clearly in love. As they walked passed me a heard them say “oh my god what’s the hell is that smell” . I crop dusted them.. It was so bad that the NYC streets couldn’t cover up my crime.

  19. “Yeah, he can’t be normal”

    I was going to the bathroom in high school when i overheard some guy saying that about me to his girl friends. He then entered the bathroom and said “hey” to me while trying not to laugh, i said it back and left

  20. Heard my now ex and my mom saying how it was my fault I wasn’t able to get a job.

    For context, I’m autist, HFA. Studied engineering and was really good at it, but obviusly lack any social skills, people view me as a “weird” no matter what I try. When looking for a job I couldn’t land anything, hearing them saying it was my fault crushed me, it’s not my fault, I did everything I could, I just have a disability.

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